We want "Russell." They’re committed to being "Future."
/Since their first public appearance, we’ve loved Ciara and Russell Wilson as a couple.
We literally melt every single time we see them together, especially with the kids. We have taken the time to ask sis for her exact prayer and have even gone to God one-by-one questioning if He made any other men as faithful, loving, compassionate, and supportive. A man who would take another man’s child and love him, as his own. A man who would honor his woman enough to make her a whole wife before welcoming their next seed. A man who would cherish her publicly, as well as, in private.
A man's man. A real man. A good man. A man of God.
Though, for some reason, some fellas have had an issue with this man’s behavior, while seeing no problem with her ex’s. Which begs me to question — how can we so boldly declare that we want a man like “Russell,” when so many men are making it clear that they’re more interested in being like “Future?”
Is it too much to ask for a man to pursue you when he’s ready for a real relationship instead of a situationship? For a man to come without confusion, without you having to guess where you stand or where you’re going? Is it too much to ask for a man to date you with intention instead of on the basis of “time will tell…” or “let’s just take it slow and see what happens?”
Or maybe it’s us…maybe, just maybe, we’re simply asking for too much. Right? Nah.
The truth is, we’re just asking the wrong people.
While watching Beauty Marks Ciara confirmed what I already knew. That this kind of love is truly worth the wait and comes with so much more than we could imagine. No, none of us can have her husband, but it's not far fetched to hope for someone to enter your life who has some of his qualities.
So no, love, you're not asking for too much when you expect loyalty. You're not wrong to want someone to date you with marriage in mind. You're not ridiculous for having standards and ya damn sure have every reason to uphold them. These requests just so happen to fall on deaf ears, since we have all found ourselves asking of them from those who don't have the emotional capacity or level of maturity needed, to give us what we deserve.
And that's okay.
We can't force anyone to be ready or to grow expeditiously at the speed of light. We didn't become the person we currently are overnight, either.
But that doesn't mean you have to settle for just anyone, when you want someone special. I mean, we've watched Ciara go through a lot of heartbreak before Russell. Though, one thing that I adore is that after what we know of and what we don’t, Ciara was still open to love. She seemed to truly learn from each relationship (i.e. she did the work to heal) —and thanks to that she got the relationship that he was ready for, and certainly deserved, when they were both in the position to receive their answered prayers.
Courtesy of capitalfm.co.ke
So to the woman who feels like her past disqualifies her from this kind of blissful future, it doesn’t. Bad relationships, break-ups, and heartbreak are all apart of the journey. To the one who keeps running back to her ex because he has some good qualities, stop. Just as God made them, He’s fully capable of creating someone else out there who has them as well; along with everything else God knows that you need (now and later). To the woman who’s sick of her phone being dry, relax. There’s a day coming when your phone will be consistently going off thanks to a man who wants to say more than “wyd.”
Have hope for your tomorrow and the man that your heart longs for, sis. A man that you can be proud of, beyond his looks (he’ll still be fine to you though!), title, or salary; but thanks to his character, heart, ability to lead, and unwavering/unconditional love for his woman and family. If your believing God for your happy ending, then believe that He’s out there and that it’ll end happier than you could imagine.
Just do me a favor…don't date anymore Future's in the meantime. ;)
XO,
Ces